These are resources for:

• autistic maskers of any gender
• newly diagnosed autistic people/questioning if autistic
• neurotypicals and non-autistics
• parents of autistic people

For Parents New to Autism:

Parent of an autistic child on how they shifted their parenting perspective:

• • How Collaborative and Proactive Solutions Changed My Family

How to talk about your autistic kid, when asking autistic adults:

• • How To Ask An Autistic 101

Explanation of why functioning labels are harmful:

• • “Autism is a Spectrum” Doesn’t Mean What You Think 

How to Understand and Model Autistic Kid’s Needs/Emotional Regulation:

• • On Energy Budgeting and Acknowledging Internal Autistic Realities

Why ABA is harmful to autistic people:

• • Invisible Abuse: ABA and the things only autistic people can see
  • Autism: Life After ABA
  • The Problem with Applied Behavior Analysis – Chloe Everett Tedx Talk

Other supports and therapies that can be helpful, that are not ABA:

• • Giant twitter thread of helpful advice from autistic people
    • This twitter thread includes some really practical information, including alternative toothbrush and toothpaste suggestions for kids who have difficulty brushing their teeth (could be sensory-based reasons)
• Resource page for alternative communication methods! 

Books and Lectures:

Auditory Sensitivity or Hyperacusis: List of ear protection from autistic adults

For Understanding Autistic People:

• Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate by Cynthia Kim (autistic women late-diagnosed)
• Women and Girls with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Understanding Life Experiences from Early Childhood to Old Age by Sarah Hendrickx (similar to above, a bit more research-based and goes through life events)
• Understanding Autistic Burnout (and everything else in this blog is amazing)
• Necessary and important blog post for parents to understand ableism
• Neurologically Mixed Relationships at Love and Autism (very good, autistic woman who talks about miscommunication between autistic people and non-autistic people. About an hour but it’s worth it.)
• Life On the Spectrum: Women Sharing Their Unique Experiences
• Amazing 3 minutes of information by an autistic girl, @BlogLibby
• Tony Atwood About Masking and Mental Health
• Best Video, best summarized – autism in women, Tony Atwood lecture (only 35 min.)
• best research video – the woman profile of autism
• Autism: How to Raise a Happy Autistic Child by Jessie Hewitson
• Link to book review: https://autisticandcheerful.wordpress.com/2018/05/12/review-autism-how-to-raise-a-happy-autistic-child/
• Blog about autistic children making friends, double empathy
• Very good video for neurotypicals about what being autistic looks like (and what not to say to an autistic person!): Autism and Disclosure
• Not autism related, but really helpful article on self-compassion and how to teach kids this skill as well
• TED talk specifically regarding measurable sensory processing differences in autistic people
• Wonderful interview by Kate Gaster with Kieran Rose on mental health and the language of autism (identity-first vs. person-first).
• Great TED talk about emotions and alexithymia (very important for allistic people to understand their subconscious social processing and emotional projection of autistic body language).
• Amazing TED talk about addiction, anxiety, and masking as an autistic person. Makes such a wonderful point at the end – “There’s no amount of achievement that makes people like you.”
• Awesome TED talk about autistic women, dating, and masking – and how NTs can help communicate with us. Very good talk about why dating is so difficult for us.
• Reasons Why ABA is Harmful To Us – lots of resources and autistic people’s experiences of ABA therapy nested in that post by Socially Anxious Advocate.
• Documentary of nonverbal autistic advocate – understanding the disconnection between movements and competence.
• Article on Autism Acceptance with a lovely BBC video on acceptance
• Explanation of autism in girls, and understanding autism acceptance
• Autism acceptance, power dynamics, and lack of welcome by society
• Lecture on Autism and Race

For social skills/understanding Neurotypicals:

• Making Friends Strategies to improve social understanding and friendship skills (good for parents and younger autistic people)
• Living Well On the Spectrum (very good for emotional regulation and some social cues – has worksheets in the back) by Dr. Valerie Gaus
• Best book I’ve found for understanding neurotypicals:
• A Field Guide to Earthlings: An autistic/Asperger view of neurotypical behavior by Ian Ford (sample of the book is here)
• (^One caveat to the above book – ignore the “sex” chapter – it has very bad advice. All other chapters are good though. More for autistic adults but some of the metaphors at the beginning of the book are very helpful, likely even to younger autistic people.)

For Unlearning Ableism:

• The Truth About Growing Up Disabled

• How to Treat a Person with Disabilities, According to People with Disabilities

Youtube channels:

These are autistic people explaining their experiences and some basic terms as well, such as how to understand meltdowns, sensory processing issues, or eye contact/body language in autistic people:

• Amethyst Schaber’s amazing youtube channel:
  • https://www.youtube.com/user/neurowonderful
• Neurodivergent Rebel’s amazing youtube channel:
  • https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdaQVw-dxYuZb2GXHL7LSjA
• Agony Autie’s amazing youtube channel:
  • https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_9AzEtuNs1waG9Jof4OaUA
• Purple Ella’s amazing youtube channel:
  • https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzske-KMAJYQn84rz6oD_yA
• Remrov’s amazing youtube channel:
  • https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_9AzEtuNs1waG9Jof4OaUA

Blog Posts about the Problems with Masking as an Autistic Person

Very important, amazing blog post on masking and mental health by the Pecan Gallery

Wonderful blog post by Spectrumy about masking and mental health

Wonderful blog post by an NT mom and experiences of her autistic daughter

Wonderful blog post by Yenn Purkis on autism and mental health

Wonderful interview with Kieran Rose on #AskKerrie about masking and mental health

Here’s a giant list of actually autistic bloggers

Social Media:

Also check out the #ActuallyAutistic hashtag on twitter (please respect that only autistic people may use that particular hashtag), as well as #TaketheMaskOff

#AskingAutistics is also helpful for asking us questions for better understanding (feel free to use this hashtag, NT or autistic, if you have questions about autistic experiences or need resources on a particular topic).

Helpful communication tools:

AAC apps (which you can obtain on an iPad or other tablet for communicating via symbols/pictures/phrases/words)

text-to-speech apps on phones (such as Emergency Chat, my favorite is Talk FREE as you can store phrases to use later)

Specific AAC and RPM resource list

These really cool laminated communication cards and key ring for disclosing autism or for communicating in a crisis or meltdown.

Learning a few signs in ASL can be helpful for communicating during a shutdown or meltdown, especially words like “yes” “no” “don’t want” “want” etc.

Flow Chart for why Talking is Hard for Us:

Oh and Fantastic Mr. Fox is an amazing movie, so I’m going to continue using this gif very far down the page: